Most toddlers are very excited to be moving out of a crib and into a bed--yet most of them don't like to spend a lot of time in the new bed either. This paradox is a combination of excitement about something new plus some fear that things are changing. By understanding the fear and embracing the excitement, you should be able to convince your toddler that his new bed is the best place to be every night.
Step 1
Talk about the transition ahead of time. Begin talking about sleeping or staying in his own bed with your toddler before you put a program in place. Appeal to your toddler's sense of independence and let him know that this comes with some responsibility. When you finally put your plan in practice, your toddler will understand what's expected of him.
Step 2
Establish a bedtime routine. Children respond well to routines and developing good sleep habits can become routine in your house. Children with bedtime rituals feel more secure and ready for sleep, according to the experts at Babycenter.com. A routine could be to brush teeth or have a bath, use the potty, read two stories and then turn out the lights. It's best to have a soothing nighttime ritual to relax your child for sleep. Part of the routine can be a reminder to stay in her bed.
Step 3
Create a reward chart with your child. Some children respond to praise, while others need more incentive. Create a reward chart where, after a predetermined number of successful nights, your child will earn a favored toy or activity. "Supernanny" Jo Frost suggests using a reward chart once your child is 3 years old and fully explaining what is expected in order to earn the reward. Keep it simple to start, such as requiring a child to stay in bed for 30 minutes to earn a star (which should be long enough to fall asleep).
Step 4
Treat nighttime wandering neutrally. If your child does get out of his bed at night, take him by the hand, say "back to bed," and escort him to his bed. Give him a pat on the back and say "good night" with a reminder that he needs to stay in his bed for the night. Don't give your child any more attention than necessary to get him back into his own bed as getting out of bed could become an attention-seeking behavior.
Step 5
Be understanding if your child is fearful. Tell her that she needs to stay in bed, but that you are nearby and will check on her in a few minutes. Follow through on your promise, and by the second or third check your child will likely be asleep.
Step 6
Sit outside your child's door if she is very resistant to staying in her own bed. When your child gets up and starts to leave her room, you can immediately get her back into her own bed, before she's had the chance to do any wandering.
Tips and Warnings
- Children who don't want to go to bed often have real or imagined fears. Many a parent has put together an arsenal of monster-be-gone spray, bad dream nets and under-the-bed checking devices to help with these issues.
Things You'll Need
- Reward chart
