Divorce is a painful decision. It can be more painful when children are involved, as the concept of divorce is pretty abstract and hard to grasp for kids. Using books to help talk about divorce and feelings can not only help your children understand what's happening in their family, but can also provide them a vocabulary with which to talk about their feelings.
"Dinosaurs Divorce"
"Dinosaurs Divorce: A Guide for Changing Families" is a book written in comic book style by Laurene Krasney Brown and Marc Brown. Written for you to read aloud with your school-aged children, this book is logically organized into specific events that a child might encounter. The events include talking with friends, living with one parent and setting up house in two homes. The dinosaur children and parents also present solutions to help children discover the best way to manage through each of these events.
"How Do I Feel About My Parents' Divorce?"
When read aloud with your children, this book--written by Julia Cole for children in their later elementary years--provides a critical opportunity for you and your children to dialogue about the divorce. This sensitive book discusses the reasons for divorce, how to handle feelings and how to find a good place when things are bad at home. The book includes photographs and pictures that assure children that, while each situation is unique, the event of divorce is common.
"It's Not Your Fault, KoKo Bear"
Written by Vicky Lansky, this book focuses on the preschool child. Every page of the book includes an illustration that helps children follow the story and includes helpful ideas for you to discuss with your children. The book's focus is on using the story to help make the process of divorce less abstract for the very young child and ensuring that children don't blame themselves for the family change.
"Pre-Teen Pressures: Divorce"
This book, written by Debra Goldentyer, focuses on the pre-teen child. The author recommends that you read the book first, then use is a tool to dialogue with your pre-teen as the causes of divorce are discussed clearly and include alcoholism and infidelity.
At this age, most children can understand the finality of divorce yet don't have the emotional vocabulary to express their feelings. This book helps families work through the emotions and logistics of divorce while remaining sensitive to the pre-teen's feelings.
