1. Infertility--What Does It Mean?
Most medical professionals define infertility as one year of trying to conceive a child without a successful pregnancy, whether you weren't able to get pregnant at all, or got pregnant and suffered a miscarriage. Doctors would like you to try to conceive for a year before beginning the process of determining why you might be having trouble conceiving, but if you're over 35 years of age they might start testing sooner.
2. Many Causes Are a Mystery
Issues with ovulation, hormone levels, malformed sperm or low sperm counts are just some of the reasons why a couple may have trouble conceiving. Infertility has a medically identifiable cause 90 percent of the time. The remaining 10 percent of couples have unexplained infertility, based on current knowledge about conception. Telling a couple who's been trying to have a baby for a while to, "Just relax, go on vacation, it'll happen!" really isn't helpful, and often makes the couple feel like it's their fault that they haven't been successful yet.
3. Get a Little Help From Science
Some methods of helping a couple get pregnant are fairly simple, such as the prescription of a low dose fertility drug and assistance with understanding the best timing for intercourse when trying to conceive. Other methods such as intra-uterine insemination (IUI), and in-vitro fertilization, (IVF) are more invasive and expensive. Although some states have mandated the coverage of certain levels of infertility diagnosis and treatment, some procedures are lacking insurance coverage.
4. Infertility is Intensely Emotional and Personal
Infertility affects not only the couple's dream of a family, but also their work, relationships with others and their marriage. If you have a friend going through infertility treatments, they may or may not want to talk about it. The couple may have a few close friends with whom they share every detail, and have others that they know they can spend time with and not have to talk about their current procedures. Both roles are incredibly important to the couple, so don't pry if it's obvious they don't want to talk about it even if they've discussed things with you in the past.
5. Consider Adoption
Making the decision to adopt is much more than a couple deciding that adoption is Plan B if infertility treatments aren't successful. It starts with grieving the biological child they may never have, while their hearts begin to open to the thought of loving and raising a child that was born to someone else. If that's the path a couple chooses to take, they'll find the parental bond every bit as strong with an adoptive child as it is with those who have biological children. Some couples may choose to remain childless, focusing their energies and finances elsewhere. Either way, it's a decision that only the couple can make, and should not be taken lightly.
