Convincing a toddler to sleep in her own bed can be a challenge, especially if she's used to sleeping with her parents or is transitioning from a crib to a toddler bed. Toddlers are determined to be their own people and explore the world around them, yet still need to feel a sense of normalcy and security. Providing that security while recognizing her independence and personality may help make bedtime go a lot smoother.
Make It Personal
Toddlers, especially older ones, are beginning to discover interests of their own, and their room should reflect that. Enlist your child's help in transforming his room from an infant's nursery into a "big boy" room. This can be as elaborate as a complete redesign with new paint, murals, furniture and fixtures or as simple as putting up a few posters depicting their favorite characters. Creating a personal space can help your child feel more secure and in control.
Establish a Routine
A 2007 study by Dr. Jodi Mindell, a psychology professor at Saint Joseph's University in Philadelphia and published in the March 2007 edition of the Journal of Family Psychology, found that establishing a bedtime routine causes a significant decrease in sleep-related problems and toddlers who stuck to a routine called out to their parents or left their bed less than those without a routine. Whatever routine you establish, you'll have to repeat it every night, so you may want to keep it simple. For example, start with a bath, follow with a story and a snuggle, then end with lights-out time.
Tackle the Monsters
Fear of the dark and the possibility of monsters lurking under the bed or in the closet is common in toddlers and young children. Lesia Oesterreich, M.S. of Human Development and Family Studies at Iowa State University suggests avoiding lectures about monsters not being real, as your toddler may not believe you. Instead give her the tools to cope. Make use of her imagination and suggest she turn the scary monster into a funny one. Give her a flashlight or use a special room spray to "repel" monsters. Lavender-scented spray has the added benefit of creating a more relaxing atmosphere.
Take It Slow
Separation anxiety is common during the toddler years. If your toddler is having a particularly difficult time separating from you at night, try taking it slow. Start out lying next to his bed for a specific amount of time, then movie to a chair and finally, leave the room completely. Reassure him that you will be close by if he needs you.
Reward Good Efforts
Provide a small reward if your toddler makes it through the night in his own bed, or at least makes a strong attempt to do so. Stickers on a special "bedtime" chart are inexpensive and have the added benefit of giving you and your child a visual progress report. Set a goal with him and provide a larger reward for reaching it. For example, if he sleeps in his own room for a week, he gets extra time at the park.
