1. The Six-Week Rule
Your doctor may have warned you against having sex until at least six weeks after giving birth. Although there is no documented research to support this advice, many doctors still advise new moms to abide by the six week rule to prevent infection that may arise postpartum. However, studies reveal that the cervix has closed and most incisions and lacerations have healed just two weeks postpartum. But it also has been observed that it takes approximately six weeks for the uterus to return to "normal" size after a vaginal delivery.
Women should generally wait until their doctor tells them when it is appropriate to have sex again. There are a few women who may have experienced significant blood loss or severe lacerations and episiotomies and these women should abide by the six week rule, at least.
2. Set The Pace
Whether you have followed the six week rule or not, the most important thing to remember about sex after childbirth is that you can decide when it is time to resume your normal sexual activity. If you are breastfeeding, your body may already be giving you some signals that it is not ready to begin sexual activity. Some of these signals include a dry vagina. Soon after childbirth your vagina may be dry and tender and you may experience some discomfort during penetration.
If vaginal dryness becomes an issue you may use lubrication in the form of a gel or cream. You may also want to ease back into sexual intercourse by trying different positions to both control penetration as well as ease pressure.
3. Pregnancy Risks
According to the Department of Health and Human Services, when mothers are breastfeeding their ovaries can stop releasing eggs, which might make it harder for them to get pregnant again. A woman's menstruation can also stop during breast feeding, but there are no guarantees that she will not get pregnant while nursing. The only way to make sure that a pregnancy does not occur is to use a method of birth control. If a woman wants to use a birth control pill while breast feeding, the safest type is the "mini pill." However, you should talk with your health care provider about what birth control method is best for you to use while breast feeding.
Women who are exclusively bottle feeding or who are breast feeding but supplementing with a bottle have a higher risk of postpartum pregnancy and may be fertile again after just two weeks post delivery. These women should use a good method of contraception if they do not intend to become pregnant so soon after the first delivery.
4. After Baby Impact
For some women there may be a big difference between when they are physically able to have sex versus when they are emotionally able to resume sexual activities. Soon after delivery, there are many changes that may have occurred in the body as well as changes in hormones and lifestyle. With the baby now at home there are the demands of a newborn which will take a toll of the amount of sleep that both partners are receiving at night, which ultimately has an impact on sex drive and sexual desire.
It is ultimately the mother's decision and then a joint decision as to the right time to resume intimacy. Even if sex is not at the forefront of your mind immediately after delivery, it is important to nurture the bond between the parents in a non-sexual manner to maintain your relationship.
5. Postpartum Depression
Many women may not be interested in resuming sex directly after delivery and this could be attributed to postpartum depression (PPD). PPD is a condition that describes a combination of symptoms that can either be physical or emotional. The changes that occur after a woman gives birth can sometimes leave her feeling sad, anxious, afraid or confused. PPD can begin immediately after giving birth or may take several months for the symptoms to materialize. Some of the symptoms include feeling restless or irritable, fatigue, insomnia, overeating and weight gain. You also may lose interest or pleasure in many activities, including sex. Postpartum depression can be treated with counseling or medication.
