1. Express Confidence and Optimism
Good self-esteem is key to proper flirting. You never want to reveal a sense of nervousness, apprehension or discomfort. Smile when you talk. Be open and inviting in your tone at all times. You want the other person to feel relaxed and at ease. It may help sometimes to lower your expectations a bit. Just look at it as a fun conversation and nothing more. That helps keep any worries or nervousness in hand and lets you enjoy the process more fully.
2. Be Aware Of Body Language
We say a lot in our movements and facial expressions when we flirt. Read the signals of the person you're talking to carefully and be aware of the signals you may be sending out. Gauge the distance between you and the other person; the closer he stands, the more positively he is responding to you. Maintaining eye contact is another good sign, as is mirroring your movement and actions. Also learn to watch for signs of nervousness and apprehension, such as slouched posture, hands in pockets or an inability to look at you directly. It might not mean that the person isn't interested, only that he is shy and nervous and may need time to warm up to you.
3. Engage in Open Topics of Conversation
Avoid statements of fact or close-ended questions when you talk. Instead, engage the other person in ways that encourage her to open up. Ask about her job, interests, family, or schooling. Enquire whether she has seen a recent movie or read a popular book and ask what she thought about it. Always stay positive and upbeat in your comments and stress friendliness even if you disagree with what she has to say. It's all about opening up a connection.
4. Use Compliments Liberally But Carefully
Compliments are a good way to get the other person to open up and can be added throughout the conversation as appropriate. However, it's important to make the compliments genuine. Most people can pick up on phony or perfunctory compliments very easily, and excessive praise can ring hollow as well. Flatter the other person regularly, but make sure it's always honest and doesn't segue into gushing.
5. Never Flirt With Someone Who Doesn't Interest You
Sending flirtatious signals to someone you have no interest in can give that person the wrong impression and embarrass her if you cut off the encounter later. Flirtation involves a certain amount of showiness, but it should always be honest and reflect a genuine interest in whomever you're flirting with.
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