In the road to adoption, adoptive parents must carefully consider all of the challenges and problems they may face through the process, not just the end result. Some may find that the problems with adoption sway them to choose a different type of adoption or better prepare them for the adoption process. Carefully consider all of the pros and cons before you decide whether adoption is the right course of action, and keep your eyes open to potential problems so you don't feel blindsided.
Medical Issues
Often, children are put up for adoption because the birth parents aren't fully able to care for a medical issue or mental disability that their child was born with. This leaves a bevy of children for adoption who come with their own complex set of problems and challenges, notes KidsHealth.org. Getting all of the medical files and facts straightened out before you proceed with the adoption can alert you to potential problems and help you understand the breadth of the issues before you finalize the adoption.
Bonding
Some parents and adopted children simply have trouble bonding with each other. In 2009, Antia Tedaldi gave up her 18-month-old adopted son for adoption again, citing that they simply weren't bonding as the reason. If an adoptive parent already has children, she may not experience the same level of connection with an adopted child. Time, being together and learning about each other make up the only way to promote bonding with your adopted child.
Cancellation
Until the papers are signed, the adoption isn't finalized. Usually, the adoption papers are signed a few weeks to a few months after the child is given to the new family. Until the papers are signed, the birth mother has the right to cancel the adoption and take the child back, a problem that plagues the minds of adoptive parents until the papers are signed and the legal adoption takes place. The birth of a baby is an emotionally charged event for both sets of parents, birth and adopted, and the adoption can result in broken hearts and hurt feelings.
Expense
Not everyone can afford the high fees that adoption agencies, adoption lawyers and the government require for an adoption to legally take place. An adoption can cost anywhere from $5,000 to $25,000, notes the Federal Citizen Information Center, and hidden expenses and fees can give you a negative feeling about adoption. Making sure that you understand the costs fully before you proceed with the adoption can help protect you.
Cultural Identity
Many parents choose to adopt children from different counties or cultural backgrounds than themselves. While the thought of bettering a child's situation is understandably appealing, it can also lead to cultural confusion within the child. Dr. Larry Schreiber, former president of the North American Council on Adoptable Children, suggests that transracial adoption is deeply rewarding if you take the time to properly learn about your child's heritage and keep an open heart and mind when it comes to cultural experimentation and encouragement.
