Even though the child you gave up for adoption is an adult, perhaps with children of his own, you may find that you still think about him regularly and wonder if his life really is better as a result of your selfless sacrifice. If this is you, you're not alone. Adoption.com estimates that there are currently six to 10 million adoptees living in the United States. That's a lot of people to sort through, and even getting started can seem like a daunting task. Luckily, others have blazed this trail before you and left some bread crumbs for you to follow.
Step 1
Start an adoption search file or journal to organize your search and your finding. Begin by writing down any information you can think of regarding your adoption including the location, attorney, date and any other facts you know, regardless of how insignificant they may seem. These will serve as the backbone of your search efforts.
Step 2
Consult the Child Welfare Information Gateway's "Online Resouces for State Child Welfare Law and Policy" maintained by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. This document contains a list of adoption laws by state.
Step 3
Request a copy of the adoption records from the state or county where your adoption took place, if the law allows it. Some states allow you to access adoption records once the child is 18, and some states require a court order to unseal adoption records. Ask for access to non-identifying information if the judge denies your request for the whole record.
Step 4
Write a letter to the family court in the state or county where your adoption was finalized and ask that this letter be placed in the adoption record. Indicate your desire to find the adoptee and include your contact information. If the adoptee decides to look for you, he will then have your information.
Step 5
Sigh up and create profiles with adoption search registries. These registries, such as the International Soundex Reunion Registry, help match adoptees with those searching for them, and vice versa. Frequent adoption forums and networks, such as those at Adoption.com, to stay on top of the latest adoption search information.
Step 6
Use social networking sites. These sites, like Facebook, MySpace, LinkedIn and Twitter have millions of users. Create personal profiles and use the sites' search functions to browse people by name, age or geographical location.
Step 7
Use an adoption search agency or private detective once you've exhausted your other search options. These services are often costly, but effective.
Tips and Warnings
- Keep detailed records of all your search efforts. Keep in mind the adoptee may not wish to be contacted and in some cases may not even know about the adoption. Be prepared for your child to have different values, opinions and political or spiritual affiliations than you might have chosen. A biological link doesn't ensure instant compatibility.
