While adoption might be the best choice for all of the parties involved in the process, birth mothers and adoptive parents may forget how it can ultimately affect the adopted child. Some children will thrive in their new environment with adoring adoptive parents, but others will always harbor feelings of resentment, rejection and abandonment due to the situation. Carefully consider how adoption will affect your child before you choose it as a viable option for you and your family.
Social Confusion
Every child grows up with a social identity, one that is ultimately instilled in them through their race, class and family status, says Adoption.com. An adopted child may be of a different race than his adoptive parents, and feel the need to fit in with a social identity that is different than that of his adoptive parents. He may feel guilty for "betraying" his heritage and feel as though he doesn't fit in with his peers.
Depression
The rates of depression in adoptees are typically much higher than children that are biologically connected to their parents, a study by Florida Atlantic University found. Whether this is due to a muddled social identity, feelings of abandonment or issues carried with the adopted child into adolescence, adoptive parents may feel at a loss at to how to deal with feelings that they likely don't understand.
Rejection
It is hard for a child to feel anything more than rejection upon learning of her adoption, warns Adoption.com. She may feel as though her birth parents didn't want her, or that she wasn't good enough for them. Even if her feelings could not be any further from the truth, she carries the feelings of rejection with her throughout her life, and may even project it on to other relationships. For instance, she may constantly fear that the people she loves will abandon and reject her.
Bonding
When a child is put up for adoption, both the birth mother and adoptive parents may struggle with feelings of bonding with and attachment to the child. A child may have delayed bonding issues, says KidsHealth.org, a division of the Nemours Foundation. This may be because babies are programmed to bond almost immediately with their birth mothers. A baby who is given up for adoption doesn't get to have the same bonding experiences, and may take longer to become settled and bonded to her adoptive mother.
Genetic Information
An adopted child may have medical issues that go largely undetected due to genetics, points out the Child Welfare Information Gateway. Genetic and medical information that could help you understand a child's ailments, genetic diseases and medical history is simply unavailable. This could pose problems as he ages into adolescence and adulthood, and even parenthood, as the child is unsure of his medical background.
