Although a common media portrayal of a cheating man is an insidious guy with lipstick on his collar, not all cheaters are so obvious. According to a study by marriage counselor M. Gary Neuman, an estimated one in every 2.7 men will cheat in their marriage, and many of them will get away with it. Of these men, 69 percent of them will claim to have never considered cheating a possibility. In reality, weakness can get the best of even well-intentioned men. Fortunately, some clues can help their partners discover their infidelity early on.
Suspicious Payments
A cheating man will more than likely spend extra money. If you discover that your partner has made unexplained purchases for gift items you never received, ask him about them. He may also be going out to eat more than normal or taking unexplained trips and racking up bills at restaurants, hotels and gas stations. If your partner is more careful about keeping documentation of his spending under wraps, he may begin to take out extra cash at the ATM or open a new checking account.
Extra Time Spent Away
When a man is carrying on a side relationship, he needs to have extra time to spend with his new interest. He may explain time away by saying that he has to work overtime and go on abnormally frequent business trips. He may also explain his time away by saying that he's spending more time with friends after work. If you are suspicious about your man's behavior, you can check his odometer to determine if it matches with where he says he's been going. You can also call his office to determine his whereabouts when he says he is working overtime or is supposedly away on a business trip.
Strange Phone and Internet Behaviors
Modern luxuries such as cell phones and the Internet make cheating easier than ever. However, they may also quickly offer a cheater's partner some telltale clues. A cheating partner may be on edge about his cell phone habits, quickly hanging up when he receives calls, retreating to another room to take his calls, or simply not answering his calls at all. This behavior may extend to his online behavior, where he may be spending extra time at the computer. To protect his virtual whereabouts, he may go to extra lengths to protect his account passwords and clear the search history.
Aloofness
Initial guilt about cheating may cause a man to spend extra time and effort doting on his partner and potentially their children. Over time, however, he may begin to distance himself from his loved ones. To his partner, this may mean less contact, more criticism and infrequent sex. To his family, this may mean less time spent playing with the kids and less effort expended on housework. When asked about his change in behavior, he will likely be on the defensive and have trouble maintaining a convincing explanation.
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