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Member Comments
By suzyq1234 on November 20, 2009 at 06:04 AM
Does everyone have to hit a rock bottom in order to be successful at being sober?
By Anonymous on November 20, 2009 at 08:22 AM
You don't have to get right to the bottom to realise you need to stop drinking. Get out whilst your falling before you eventually crash. It will feel so good you did it because you wanted to, not because you destroyed everything and it was the only option left.
By Irenems on November 20, 2009 at 09:06 AM
I agree with anonymous. It's about listening to that nagging little voice inside that lets you know you're drinking too much and causing problems for yourself before you lose everything. This is your heart and soul talking to you, not the voice of the beast that will always want you to continue drinking. I know my head can be a very busy place sometimes!
I also know people that hit bottom and stayed there till they died because they didn't see a way out.
By popejackson on November 20, 2009 at 12:39 PM
I think you have to make the mature decision to walk away from alcohol for good, and not change your mind, in order to be successful at being sober. Much like an epic breakup of sorts. You just say good bye, and mean it.
Rock bottom is a fairly relative term. No doubt that an accountable negative experience helps get one to that decision though.
By Dejasade on November 20, 2009 at 01:04 PM
I agree with Popejackson. I think you just need to say: BYE. And not drink it. As hard as it sounds (and, mind you, I have not done that yet) - it's not as hard as you are strong.
By Irenems on November 19, 2009 at 11:24 PM
Dejasade, I'm not trying to be a smart ass, but quitting is the only way. I've tried for many years to "control" the drinking and it doesn't work. Being sober is really alot of fun, and you never wake up regretting what you did the night before. Each day like that will make you stronger and grateful to be out of that vicious cycle.
By Dejasade on November 20, 2009 at 05:54 AM
I drank last night :( I didn't get weird or do anything weird...but I HID it frm my BF---which is bad.
I want to wake up and not regret what I did the night before...I truly do.
When I get home I am going to throw out the bottles of wine I have @ home. I really am. It will make it easier.
By doorguy on November 20, 2009 at 06:23 AM
yeah, it's kind of crazy.....the vicious cycle..
I've been working on this for a few months..had some successes, had some horrible failures...I've come to realize that as I am at least aware of this ongoing battle, I have come to despise alcohol....I agree that each morning I wake up sober and fresh with no regrets...rested....I am so inspired.
Why do I like to feel like shit again the next day, being so unproductive? This is the first work week in a long time that I can truly say I haven't been hung over one day. It's just a small step.
But the desire to drink has almost been replaced with some sort of despisement for A.....it wrecks my body, makes me unhealthy, and makes me unproductive and feel like a loser.
By Dejasade on November 20, 2009 at 07:35 AM
Dorrguy: good for you!! I am inspired by YOU lol. I am a very strong person...I have a great workout routine, a great diet, I am motivated @ my job, I can save $$$ (most times) - but when it comes to drinking...I just lose it! Last night for example, I had ONE glass of wine @ dinner and was going to leave it at that. Then my BF said he was going to play hockey...which means i'd be home for 2 hrs by myself (I enjoy that time alone, bc it's not often) - so I hit up the bottle!!!!
uhhhgghhh.......I want to say I went ONE week w/out drinking. maybe I start that on Monday???
By Dejasade on November 19, 2009 at 01:38 PM
I have been posting at "drink less alcohol" but decided to jump over here. I definitely need help w/ my drinking...I don't drink every day. I usually drink 2-3 times a week...but when I do it is ALL OUT drinking. I can't stop. I get weird, I say odd things, I black out, etc. It's time to stop. It is SO hard. I want to come home and relax with some wine. But I can't stop at 1 or 2 or even 3 glasses. In fact, if wine is gone i'll drink just about anything else (liqour, beer, champagne). Like tonight, I have 20 minutes left of work and I want to go home and have wine. Badly. How can I stop this cycle???
By davelking on November 19, 2009 at 06:54 PM
I know what you mean, I have tried to control my drinking for soooo long, but as soon as I have one glass of whiskey, I cant stop until I pass out. I think the best and only way to stop the cycle is to not start the cycle and admit you have no control. I have and it makes me feel slightly in control now. Good luck to you.
By Irenems on November 19, 2009 at 11:20 PM
The only way to stop the cycle is to quit drinking.
By dbaywes on November 19, 2009 at 06:41 PM
Back on the wagon!
By davelking on November 18, 2009 at 04:21 PM
Doing better today, haven't had a drink and it felt good to be at work. I was out of work for 4 months and was doing good at not drinking so much. Since I found this job, my drinking has gotten way out of control, but I now know what have to do. Thanks for your comments...
By Irenems on November 18, 2009 at 09:49 PM
Good for you. It's not always easy but it's worth it.
By popejackson on November 19, 2009 at 07:34 AM
Good news, and keep at it.
By maggielamme on November 19, 2009 at 01:30 PM
Remember to be thankful for what you DO have! We're here for you!
By Dejasade on November 19, 2009 at 01:40 PM
Take it one day at a time...you are strong!
By maggielamme on November 18, 2009 at 09:10 AM
Another day sober! Best of luck to everyone here!
By Irenems on November 18, 2009 at 01:35 PM
Amen sista!! The feeling of inner peace and joy is incredible, and I don't ever want to take it for
granted again. I am so happy to wake up each morning without a hangover, and I thank God every night for such a good day.
By popejackson on November 19, 2009 at 07:39 AM
To see you both doing so well and feeling great is inspiring to me. Thanks for being there.
By davelking on November 17, 2009 at 09:41 AM
Called in sick today, hung over from last night. Drinking a beer and whiskey at 9:30 a.m. What a lonely way to live, I need to find a way to stop...
By maggielamme on November 17, 2009 at 03:21 PM
I've heard some of the people here say; to read some of the previous posts. There are a lot of people who have and are going thru the same crap you're going thru. What you have to remember, as we all do, is that we really are stronger than the bottle. The thing is, most of us don't just "say it", we've lived it. And are still living it. Don't give up. There are too many people that need you in this world, a sober you. Don't let yourself down, and them too.
By Anonymous on November 18, 2009 at 06:38 AM
I've done that before, too. You wake up and have that burnt feeling, and feel like you have to keep drinking to stave off the horrible hangover. Do yourself a favor and limit how much you drink today, and drink as much water as you can. So today is a wash as far as work goes. Work on making sure that tomorrow is not as well. Get some sleep, sweat it out, and try not to feel like right now is the rest of your life. You do need to do something about your drinking, but today you need to get through without doing any more harm or heading into a multiple-day bender.
By Irenems on November 18, 2009 at 08:00 AM
There's alot of people out there crying for a job and you're calling in sick because you're hungover and continuing to drink....hope you keep your job or life will get a whole lot worse. Good luck getting healthy.
By suzyq1234 on November 16, 2009 at 12:17 PM
3 weeks and one day without one drop of alcohol! Yahoo!! I have re-discovered candy, and cheese-it party mix. I will try to eat better after the new year. One bad habit at a time. Till then, I will probably be eating much more. But, I will save calories because all that beer had so many calories.
By Anonymous on November 17, 2009 at 02:59 PM
When I stopped drinking I ate so much candy and cookies. It's better than the alternative. Great Job!!!
By popejackson on November 18, 2009 at 07:34 AM
Well done Suzyq, Congratulations!
By Anonymous on November 17, 2009 at 03:02 PM
125 days of sobriety One day at a time!!! It's an incredible feeling.
By Anonymous on November 17, 2009 at 06:28 PM
Congratulations!! This is wonderful!! You must feel so accomplished.
Today I am working on "stop pouting about it ya' big baby, ya just don't gitta drink". I sure do run the gamut of emotions about all of this. You seem quite happy and I am happy for you. Now I need to get happy for ME:).
By popejackson on November 18, 2009 at 07:29 AM
Great Job at staying sober!
By wereldfietser on November 18, 2009 at 01:20 AM
Hi,
will try to only drink a few beers in the weekend with the hockey boys
because it saves a lot of money
allard
By Irenems on November 16, 2009 at 08:02 PM
Went to dinner tonight with friends and family, and it was very enjoyable to just be with them. No having a couple of drinks before dinner, no wine with dinner, no after dinner drinks.....for the normal person that would end there. I would have come home and continued to drink till I had part of or a bottle of champagne and then feel like hell tomorrow.
Life is good!
By maggielamme on November 17, 2009 at 09:29 AM
Way to go Girl! I'm proud of you! I want to be that strong on Thanksgiving! Wish me luck.
By popejackson on November 17, 2009 at 01:12 PM
Great to hear Irenems!
By Anonymous on November 17, 2009 at 02:57 PM
Great Job. Keep it up.
By maggielamme on November 17, 2009 at 09:31 AM
Day 12! Hanging in there.
By popejackson on November 17, 2009 at 01:15 PM
Good Job Maggie :)
By Anonymous on November 16, 2009 at 02:54 AM
I got horribly drunk the other night. I drank way beyond my limit and threw up. I don't remember a huge amount from the night either.
I'm fed up going back to alcohol thinking I can handle it this time and always ending up in a complete binging disaster. I want try to be strong enough to have a life without alcohol.
By maggielamme on November 16, 2009 at 10:55 AM
Well, that's why you're here. That's why we're ALL here! I truly feel that every human being has the strength within themselves to take control of their lives. It is what you do with that strength, and those you chose to help you with your quest, that will determine your success. We're here to help each other. You're stronger than the drink. Remember that!
By popejackson on November 16, 2009 at 10:59 AM
I am sorry to hear you had that happen. That would be my reality at some point if I choose to drink again.
Call it day 1 today. Make a commitment to change your behavior. Embrace the fact that those days can't happen without alcohol in your life. It is hardly a recipe for success, but it does give a solid foundation.
It is easy to have a life without alcohol. In my opinion it is hard to have one with it.
Best wishes as you move forward.
By Anonymous on November 16, 2009 at 11:07 PM
Very good points you made - thank you. I am going to try and not put my self in the vunrable position drink puts me in, by staying sober I am in control of myself. 4 days since my binge.
By Anonymous on November 14, 2009 at 05:11 PM
Note to self: If you could drink in moderation you would be doing that by now. Stop teasing yourself about this concept. You don't get to...period.
Off to dinner with the girls. Have done it before without drinking and will again!!
By suzyq1234 on November 16, 2009 at 12:15 PM
Right On! If we could do it, we wouldn't be here. We can't just have one. We can't just have one and let it be ok...because there will always be a next time when it won't.
By maggielamme on November 16, 2009 at 11:05 AM
Moving forward! Holidays will be difficult, but I think I'm up to the task! best wishes to everybody! Be strong!
By popejackson on November 16, 2009 at 11:45 AM
You can do it Maggie!
By popejackson on November 16, 2009 at 11:02 AM
90 days without any alcohol, next stop is the New Year.
Keep plugging along everyone.
By Anonymous on November 15, 2009 at 06:44 PM
No. Drank 2 mohitos. It didn't help how very bad the day was. This is the day I start.
By maggielamme on November 13, 2009 at 09:27 AM
8 days.....man I wish I didn't screw up last week. I was doing so good! I feel as though I'm determined more than ever to to get to day 42 or 136 or 1,290! It's like I don't want to lose at this "game".....Guess that's the competitiveness in me. Not gonna let it beat me. Best to everyone here!
By Irenems on November 12, 2009 at 11:08 PM
Alcoholism isn't a spectator sport. Eventually the whole family gets to play.
Joyce Rebeta-Burditt
By maggielamme on November 13, 2009 at 09:24 AM
Brilliant, and true.
By doorguy on November 12, 2009 at 01:49 PM
Well, I got completely hammered last Saturday night. I'm talking like I lost count after beer number 8. I was so hung over and guilt ridden on Sunday. Recovered. Felt great Monday-today. And now the desire to drink is back. I'm even finding myself planning ways I get hammered in the next few days, and what my priorities are the day after. Why is that?
I know I can resist...but my mind wonders to thoughts like this: "I have to get up early on Saturday morning, and have a busy day all day long, so it would be better if I drank tonight, and was hung over tomorrow instead of Saturday."
Where do these thoughts come from?
Anyone else?
By B_One on November 12, 2009 at 02:47 PM
http://www.rational.org/index.php?id=36
Check out the crash course on AVRT (addictive voice recognition therapy). I think it provides a reasonable explanation of the brain function that contributes to the thoughts you are having. It also provides a way to visualize your addictive voice in effort to combat and overcome the urges and cravings.
We've all had those moments where we believe we deserve a drink, or just have one (a couple), because there is a celebration, or the big game is a good reason to party. The AVRT method really helped me work through the process and diminish the willingness to follow through on the 'reasons' I should/can drink.
Check it out and I think your question "Where do these thoughts come from?" will be answered. While this has certainly been helpful to me, there are other factors to be aware of, like diet and sugar cravings, stress (physical and mental), and social circumstances (friends, co-workers, relatives, and others that may not be supportive or make it easy to say "I don't drink anymore," and leave it at that.)
Finding people to support your decision will be very helpful as well. Once you have found that others can accept that you don't drink it will be that much easier to avoid compromising situations and 'peer pressure' that could lead you to entertain the temptations.
By maggielamme on November 12, 2009 at 04:31 PM
B_One is very wise in his response. I also feel that it helps to have people around you that support your decision to not drink. But your thinking that you should drink now, and have a hangover tomorrow as opposed to the next day when you have to get up early....perhaps you're looking at "getting hammered" as a "treat" you want to give yourself. Really,think about it, sounds kinda stupid huh?! There's got to be some other "treat" you can give yourself, anything but getting trashed. Good Luck, we're here for ya.
By Anonymous on November 12, 2009 at 08:46 PM
B-one sent me to AVRT website about a month ago and it changed my understanding. It was quite liberating really . . .intense .. . freeing. I am on day 67 and I really don't struggle with cravings or temptations anymore because I don't drink. It was not easy to get here but it is sure nice to be here. Best of luck to you doorguy. Keep us posted. I know you can do this!
By Anonymous on November 13, 2009 at 07:02 AM
My 2 cents: I've found that I go in 3-day cycles. Drink, hangover, feel OK, drink. And so on. If I can get past 3 days without alcohol those horrible cravings aren't as bad. Try to get 3 days in and see what happens from there.