Dare to Stay sober
2,089 members Daring to Stay sober have tracked a total of 16,845 times
Alcoholism can affect your health and your relationships. By cutting alcohol from your life or drinking in moderation, you can keep your heart and liver healthy.
Member Comments
This past Thursday I celebrated my 5 year soberversary. I celebrated while out of town on business, in a Sushi Bar. I remember the whole day and evening. It was great to be present for the entire day. In years past, I would have been in an Irish Bar down the street and would have most assuredly been lying my ass off the next day as to why I was late for my morning meeting.
Two things reasonate with me, five years into recovery. The first is arresting the addiction. Getting sober and removing the chemicals from your brain and body. Done successfully, we are given a place at the starting line.
Secondly, waiting for us at the start line, is the pain, the origin of what brought us to addiction. For me, this is where emotional growth and maturity began anew. This is where I eventually learned what courage is, what acceptance and forgiveness is, what compassion for others is. What faith and hope are. I learned not to be afraid to be weak. And I learned to not be too proud to be strong.
I am a changed person today, living a life free of the demons that played like a tape in my head for 45 years. Free of anger. Aware of who I am. And, willing helpful toward others.
I could go on and on. Sobriety is not easy and it takes time. Today, I realize at 5 years that I am in early recovery. I will enjoy the presence of today and look forward to tomorrow...if I am so lucky to be granted another day to live the short existence that we have.
It is my hope that you too can find the desire within yourself to want a better life, And, that you are able to find the courage necessary to have the life you deserve.
Congratulations and thank you for sharing your journey with us. -La
So proud of you, Iceman18....you are such a huge inspiration to all of us, and we're blessed to have you on here beyond measure! ~Reenie~
i SOOOOOOOOOOOOO needed to read this!!! Thank you and congratsx
ps keep posting!!!!
i SOOOOOOOOOOOOO needed to read this!!! Thank you and congratsx
ps keep posting!!!!
I have not been on here in a while. I am still sober. I have been sober for 1 year 4 months and 16 days.
The start is the hardest part and this site was a massive help. After a while your resolve strengthens and you see alcohol for what it really is, and therefore dont miss it.
I see alcolhol like an abusive ex, someone I loved once, but the thought of going back to them is rediculous.
Stopping is a very hard thing to do, but there is a huge chance it will be the most positive thing you will ever do. It is the greatest gift you can give yourself. Keep trying.
Good luck everyone x
You couldn't have put it better...I'll be sober 19 months on Monday, and I can't imagine that I wasted my life for that long. I never want to forget, because I always want to appreciate being sober.
Being sober doesn't seem to level out or get boring...it just gets better and better.
Yes, it is hard work in the beginning, which makes the reward sweeter.
I was sober for many years with no slips at all (6-7 years) but over the last couple years I have had quite a few evenings where I have gone out and gotten crazy drunk. What happens is I have one drink and think I better cram all of my drinking in while I am giving myself a free pass to do so. I've managed to not have any major ramifications (what a blessing) but I am scared that soon I will. I go for months without drinking but then I let loose and have a night out followed by a day of absolute depression, regardless of what I did the night before. Today I am committed to not drinking and I am 2 days sober. I know I need this one day at a time.
Only just coming to terms with damage I have done to myself over so many years...not had a drink for 2 weeks now and hardest part is the complete change in social life - I live in a major city and my worklife is based around a drinking culture...any tips???!
I'd like to ask the same thing. The change in the social scene. All my friends drink (which is the birds of a feather thing, I suppose), but I want to date and men often thing I'm strange because I order something non-alcoholic. It's tough to find someone who is cool with that. It's a problem for me. - Deb
It wouldn't hurt to change your routine for the short term. Find different places to go, friends you can trust to share your desire to stop drinking with, etc. Or if you need to hibernate until you are stronger in your quit, then do it, it doesn't have to be forever.
As far as your worklife, I don't know what you do but it would be very difficult to be in a job based around a drinking culture if you want to stay sober. For example I know personally I could never be in a sales role where I had many business outings. It can definitely be done, but take care of yourself first. Come up with a plan to not drink when you are out. Make sure you can get away if the temptation is too strong. (I still prefer to always drive when I go out, even if I am picking friends up, so that I know I have a way to go home if my friends are drinking heavily.) You should know what you plan to say if you are offered a drink. Don't feel obligated to explain anything you don't want to explain. Be prepared for nosy questions and be steadfast in your response, I personally employ the broken record technique - as in keep repeating the same thing. No I don't drink, if someone asks why I say, I just don't drink, etc. And be proud of the healthy choice you are making!!! You may have done some damage, but wouldn't it be worse if you continued to beat yourself up for past mistakes? You have made it two weeks, that's great!
Deb, I'm the same as you - I do get annoyed with people that find it so odd to not drink - but I figure that if they aren't cool with it then I wouldn't want to date them anyway. And I find that most people who DO make a big deal out of it or ask 20 rude questions are usually doing so because they have a problem with alcohol themselves - another reason that I wouldn't want to waste my time dating them!!
Lindsay
(I also left the above post in reply to you Boy_Racer!)
Deb, I'm the same as you - I do get annoyed with people that find it so odd to not drink - but I figure that if they aren't cool with it then I wouldn't want to date them anyway. And I find that most people who DO make a big deal out of it or ask 20 rude questions are usually doing so because they have a problem with alcohol themselves - another reason that I wouldn't want to waste my time dating them!!
Lindsay
(I also left the above post in reply to you Boy_Racer!)
I live in a major city too and bar culture has been my thing. Last night I attended a free class at a cool museum and found it intellectually stimulating. Before the class I had a nice soy latte and it tasted so good. I noted to myself that it was much more satisfying than a few beers.
Anyway, long story short, it reminded me to find alternatives that definitely exist in a big city that are alcohol free. Meet Up has lots of common interest activities.
Good for you Allard! Keep it up! Don't slip back into "just a beer or glass of wine" - it is a slippery slope we climb!
I am checking back in after time away from the board, and seeing your posts. The struggle for so many, including yours, is palpable. It is fantastic to see you more positive and accomplishing your goal. I am very proud of you! But more importantly, YOU should be proud of YOU! Keep up the good work!
Day 40, done.
I went to see a personal trainer yesterday to help with my fitness and weight loss plan. It's now official that alcohol is not in my diet plan. The calories simply do NOT fit in! :)
Iceman said below, "My goal is to not drink, one day at a time. "Never" would put to much pressure on me."
Amen to that. Never and forever feel like such a long time, no one would feel like they could make it. I am aiming for success, so often it's one hour, one day, one glass of water, one green tea at a time.
Prayers and Good Luck to all here.
Ugh! I've been struggling so much the last few days. Not sure why. It's so frustrating that I can be sober for months and then it sneaks up on me and won't leave me alone.
Hang in there...it will pass if you don't give in. I always remind myself of how life sucked when I was drinking and how much better it is now. It's the gremlin talking to you, and you are stronger than that little creep that wants to ruin you.
Thanks! I have been running through the list of why I no longer drink. I keep thinking about how I'll feel tomorrow, too. I brought home a movie to watch and I have been downing tons of water. I WILL beat that little beast down again today thanks to the advice I've read here. It helps so much!
Sorry to hear of your struggles. For what it's worth, you are not alone. The past couple of days have been difficult for me - can we blame the full moon? But seriously, I was able to talk myself through the urge - that it won't really help what's going on and I won't feel well physically anyway - so got through it. Thank goodness! All the best to you.
I wish I could check off my dot for yesterday with an exclamation point!!! Woke up without shame or regret today and feeling stronger for it. I know there will be other days of battles but I won this one. Thanks for the support! -La
Awesome job! My goal is to not drink, one day at a time. "Never" would put to much pressure on me and besides, that's off into the future and no one has a ticket to life beyond today.
Keep making progress. You're life will keep getting better, day by day!
Congrats!
Awesome.
Accountability is the key for me. I sought help from a friend I knew would support me. And reluctantly followed his advice. I had to face my wife and ask forgiveness. I have two people I can call at any time.
Day 1. Wish me luck. I have been flirting with this for a few weeks and today is the day. Gonna swim this afternoon, that usually mellows me out, I have a meeting at my house tonight but will not partake. Got lots of options AND plan on using them! have a great day everyone.
Yes, you can...I started over too many times to count, but I'm sober now and staying that way.
If I can do it so can you!
I've had the flu/cold but still sober. I used to drink a bottle of wine when I was sick because I figured it had to be better for me than Nyquil.
Iceman, how many more days till your five years???
Feel better! -La
Get well Reenie! Boy, do I remember those days of drinking right through being sick. Not fond memories.
Four more days until the big 5 year soberversary. Looking forward to that.
Enjoy Super Bowl Sunday everyone. And remember, its just one more day along our journey. Nothing more, unless we make it that. There is no reason to attach any other significance to the day. Make sure you have a plan and "Just don't drink, no matter what"....always a good starting and end point.
Big plans for the game tomorrow? What is everyone's game plan to avoid drinking? This is a tough time for a lot of people so let's hear it.
I had a very vivid dream last night that I drank. I was so upset and disappointed with myself. What a relief when I woke up and realized it wasn't true. I am grateful for the dream, though. Experiencing those feelings again of shame and regret, even in a dream, is a good reminder of why I have made this commitment. Hope everyone has a relaxing, sober weekend. -La
Yes, very quiet. I'm hoping it's because everyone is so busy enjoying a sober life. :0) -La
By seebetter on February 12, 2012 at 12:48 PM
The greatest trick alcohol ever pulled was convincing the world that you needed it to enjoy the company of your friends.