Just to compare daily logs with people in a similar stage in life. Grad school or just out of college and working. The 'no kids, have cereal and cake for dinner' group.
Okay, so I feel guilty as writing this, but I just need some... consolation,
we'll say.
K so I've been with Pete for a year and a half. It's as serious as it can be,
being 4 hours apart. We are planning on getting married. He has my engagement
ring and I have his wedding band. I'm just waiting for him to talk to the
'rents and pop the question.
Here's where it sucks. There are 3 men 'in my life' I guess you could
say. One is in Tennessee and we have known each other for 4 years (no it's not an
online thing. He was a friend of a friend, and I talked him through a break up, and
visited him and we still keep in touch). Number two and I had sort of a summer fling
(not sex, we were just dating without the title) about 3 years back, but he now lives in
Chicago. Lucky number 3 is an army infantryman and now lives 3
hours away - he actually cheated on his 'on-a-break-girlfriend' with me (I feel
terrible, honestly) - but we have such an intense connection.
I think I'm actually typing this out for my own piece of mind. I love attention
and flirting as much as the next girl, but I will not leave Pete, nor cheat on him EVER
(or only leave if there was a damm good reason). But why do each of these 3 find it
necessary to come unbelievablly hooked on me while I'm in a long-term relationship?
None of them are telling me to leave him, they say they don't want to ruin things in my
relationship (smart move on their part, btw) - but it's just hard to turn my back on
everything that 'could have been'. Each of these 3 has had TERRIBLE luck in
relationships and I know they all love my personality and drama-free life - and
apparently just recently discovered I'm someone who can hold that evasive stable
relationship. Just irritating that they didn't see a good thing while they
had it.
So reaffirming, I am so madly in love with Pete. If anything, talking with
these fellas just makes me want to see Pete even more and give him everything they
didn't want when they had the chance.
This always happens, guys that have been in your life forever come out of the woodwork when you're in a stable relationship. When they realize how luck another guy is they feel like they are missing out. You have done nothing wrong and your thoughts are COMPLETLY normal. Just be happy where you are hun, those guys will find women who make them happpy, it doesn't have to be you.
P.S. I've been there so message me if you want someone to talk to. I'm always around.
Edited by sdsunshine, on March 15th, 2010 at 1:31 pm.
Thanks girlie. I appreciate it. That's my problem is I want to be there for everyone. Luckily, even when they ditched me and thought they had something better, I stayed friends - so at least no hard feelings.
lol Army infantry is such trouble. Trouble that can only be surpassed by Marine infantry.
Ahhhh, the good old days. ;)
And if they ditched you at any point, they're totally not worth it.
I say go for Pete hes the only one who's stepped up otherwise the opthers won't ever be with you because they all live way far away....and Petes the only one who loves you enough to ask you and your dad too! Go for it girl!
One thing I have learned about men (besides they all suck!!!) is that they want what they can't have. In your case, they know you are happy and a great girlfriend and they realized what they missed out on.
I agree with Kallie to stick with Pete. You don't seem to have any negative feelings towards him, which is good! As long as he is the stable one and can provide the support/love/etc that you need, then don't worry about those other guys.
If you need to talk, I'm here for ya!
Thanks girls. :) Like I said, I'm with Pete for good (unless he causes havoc in my life, or doesn't want me anymore!)
I just hate the temptation. Nothing wrong with a little shameless flirting, but it just feels like this is on a whole new level, and not so 'shameless'. I just keep trying to think of the negatives... the one I couldn't trust because if he'd 'cheat' with me, he'd cheat on me, that sorta thing.
Pete is a good guy, even if he is a butthead sometimes. :) None of that leading-me-on business.
Works both ways. It's human nature to want something you can't have. When I was single and my friends and I would go out, we'd have a lot better luck if a female friend was at our table with us. You have it figured out, though. There will always be temptations. The right person doesn't come around so often.
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