ZanyZanne

I've been married almost 4 years to the love of my life, Matt Proksch. We met over 16 years ago, but it took us a while to figure out what was best for the both of us. Currently, I work at CenturyLink as a Sales and Care Supervisor. (It sounds more important when I capitalize each word.) I both love and hate the job.

Before this marriage, I was a single mother of 2 children. I have a 19 year-old son named Chris, who is struggling with most of his life's decisions, and while this has been incredibly painful for me to watch, I've seen a lot of growth in him. I have a 15 year-old daughter named Mikayla who is extremely driven to excellence and a wonderful musician and singer. I have a nearly 2 year old toddler who keeps me busy and will hopefully keep me young!

I'm contemplating writing about my life experiences as I've been told many times that there may be some entertainment value held within!

I've struggled with my weight my entire life. I remember being taunted, teased, and mocked as early as age 8 due to my large backside. Was told once by a doctor that I had perfect child-bearing hips (ha! 3 children by c-section). Neither my siblings, nor my friends struggled the way I did with weight. Since my parents didn't drive me anywhere, I walked and rode my bike everywhere, but I was a bookworm most of the time and certainly was not a fan of moving my body more than I had to. I wasn't necessarily an overeater, but a very poor eater. Convenience foods, junk food and snacking were my enemy. Boredom and an intense need to multi-task in order to concentrate also contribute. It was not unusual for me to read a book, watch TV and be shoving something in my mouth simultaneously.

I had my first weight loss victory when I lost 50 pounds my senior year of high school. That victory lasted less than a year before college and an unplanned pregnancy unraveled it. Convinced by a doctor that I should try a shot of depo-provera in 1992 - I suddenly gained 70 pounds in 8 weeks - ballooning up to 235 pounds. Of course, there was no medical explanation and I was told that I must have eaten myself into that weight - to the tune of 5000 calories a day - no. To this day, I believe the hormonal influx contributed to a bad combination of stress and poor eating habits.

Lost some weight off and on - fad diets, different hormonal combinations of birth control - but overall my body mass was increasing. In 1999, while working for a local newspaper, I was involved in a terrible car accident that wrangled my back into worse state than the slight birth defect and my current obesity had already wreaked on it. Lack of exercise, boredom, and being a food addict made a bad situation worse. I became very ill with issues with my gall bladder and after a medically induced case of pancreatitis nearly took my life in 2001, weight took a backseat to everything else. I recovered, slowly - but by this time, I could care less about losing weight. I was in an abusive relationship and extremly depressed and as a result, I gained weight very quickly and by 2003 I tipped the scales at over 300 pounds.

By late 2004, weighing 330 pounds, I finally found someone in the medical profession who helped me prioritize my life - my health and wellness needed repair. We created an action plan which would lead me to a path where I could qualify for gastric bypass surgery. It was an option I had often considered, but wasn't sure I could handle - there were so many requirements. It was a lifestyle change, a commitment and of course, I needed to find a way to cover the surgical costs.

After a lot of work with some fantastic people, in December 2005, I had RNY surgery performed at Mayo Clinic. It was supposed to be a laproscopic procedure, but because of my previous near death experience - they had to convert to an open procedure because of the amazing amount of scar tissue damange they'd found. It was a difficult recovery and I foolishly went back to work 10 days after I had it which caused future complications.

By July 2007 I weighed 158.5 pounds and felt the best I ever had. While I had amazing amounts of extra skin all over my body, I was able to have my belly dealt with because of incisional hernias that had occured and needed repair.

I married my husband in October 2007 weighing 162 pounds and wearing a size 10. We wanted to get pregnant and we tragically lost 2 pregnancies - 1 at 6 weeks and a twin pregnancy at 18 weeks. With each unsuccessful pregnancy, I gained 10 pounds that I could not lose. After my successful pregnancy with my daughter, Madisynne, I found myself stuck at 202 pounds. Still 128 pounds less than my worst weight, but it was a frightening number to me.

I joined Livestrong.com in July 2010 and have lost 23 pounds. It's been very slow. I'd been eating about 1000-1200 calories per day since I'd had the baby, but tracking those calories on this website made me accountable. I began to look at food and think "If I eat that, I'll have to track it." It was easier to "see" my food for what it really is - junk food is just that - junk.

I also read about estrogen dominance and it seemed like those symptoms matched up perfectly with some of the issues I'd fought in the past with hormone issues/birth control/pregnancy. The medical profession does not support the idea of estrogen dominance, but I began to use a progesterone cream that helped me feel tons better and that's when the weight started to come off. I'd been eating well, and walking up to 4 miles a day, but didn't lose anything until I started the cream.

I plateaued with my weight in November 2010 and kept using Livestrong and the cream religiously. While the cream was helping me with some of my hormonal issues, it wasn't enought and I spoke with my doctor about having a hysterectomy. I was stuck between 181-185 for what felt like forever. Finally in February 2010, I decided I needed to quick tracking my food until after I had this surgery.

I just had the hysterectomy. They removed my right ovary too. It's my 7th abdominal surgery - so the pain part doesn't bother me, but the fatigue is incredibly profound. Apparently this is due to the hormonal shift in my body. The cool thing is - this seems to have jump-started my weight loss and as of this writing I am under 180 pounds for the first time in 3 years.

Right now, I'm down 151 pounds from my highest weight. My goal is to weigh 140 pounds and stay there. I'm just under 5'4", so this puts me barely in a healthy weight. I've been this weight before (even if if was for only a few months), so I know I can do it. I'll never be tiny, but I can be fit and healthy. I want to run in a half-marathon someday - but I have neuroma in my toes that requires surgery and the thought of any additional surgery right now kills my motivation. I'm looking into other ways to move my body effectively - biking and swimming are certainly viable options.

My gastric bypass has been a valuable tool for me and one that I'm grateful for. It was certainly not an easy way out and it's changed my life. I don't take prescription medications for blood pressure, GERD, pain or depression. I'm an involved parent for my children. I have an active lifestyle and any pain I do have is managed by me through more natural means - yoga, biofeedback, distraction and physical exercise. I know that I still have work to do and as I am turning 40 this year - I'm prepared to do it.

Thanks for reading!