Dr. F. Felicia Ferrara has more than 25 years of experience in psychology with a specialization in childcare and adolescent adjustment. Ferrara maintains a private practice in Tampa, Fla. and consults in Pasco, Hillsborough and Pinellas Counties within the family court system. She has trained many educators and psychology students on child assessment, diagnosis and treatment as a former associate professor in the university setting. Above all, Ferrara loves to circulate expert knowledge along with her vast background and training to help people with all types of childcare issues.
DR. F. FELICIA FERRARA, PHD: Hello! I am Dr. Felicia, the parent coach. I've been working with families and children for over 25 years now so I have encountered many a different social problems in the family. What we are going to talk about today is how to encourage your teenager to have a social life. This is a very difficult problem. If you happen to have a child who is quiet, withdrawn, or just wants to stay in their room and a read a book. Well, other parents might pray for that; when you see it constantly, you become concerned as well. Okay, so some tips to do is #1: Try to get your child involved in an activity. Very often, for the very shy child, if they have a task to work on in front of them, it makes talking to other people easier because we are talking about the task versus talking person-to-person. So if there is a club they can join, if it is Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, if it is a swim team, if it is a sailing club, dance club, whatever that might be, whatever the interest of the child is, try to get that teenager involved in that. Now, if the task or joining a social club is to too terrifying for the shy child, you can also suggest that they might do community work. Every child in high school usually has to accumulate so many community hours so perhaps your child wants to volunteer for the hospital. So in fact, they are doing something for someone else. Maybe they want to volunteer to the senior center or volunteer to an orphanage or foster home. So whatever that activity is that they feel needed for, then you want to help them in that activity. What can you do is get information on all the activities you think your child might like and then actually sit down in a casual way with them and discuss each opportunity and see which it is that the child likes. One last method is that you can call a neighbor who has the same age child, a neighbor or a relative, and allow those children to meet one-on-one first, and then both of them join these activities. That kind of gives an extra boost to confidence to children. Remember, all children need is one good friend and it is a heck of a confidence builder and they are happy to go to school again, or to at least go out maybe to a movie or to some social event. So remember, select the different activities, it could be work-related, club-related, social activity, or one-on-one with a friend. If you keep that in mind, your child will soon be running out the door and you will be sorry you ever started it. So good luck mom and dad. We will see you soon.
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