As children approach their teenage years, they generally have a desire to start dating. In the past, boy-girl relationships have been contained in the classroom, on the playground, at the place of worship or in the neighborhood. Once they become teenagers, these children want to get together on their own. Dating enables teenagers to get to know how to get along, communicate, make decisions and be assertive, claims the Dating website.
History of Dating
Before the early 20th century, young men and women courted by the boy visiting the girl at her family home. His primary goal was to find a suitable wife. As the girl's family remained nearby---often in the same room---they got to know each other. According to TheSite.org, women were in control of the relationship as the man set out to convince her that he would be a fitting husband.
Shortly after the turn of the century, young women began to demand rights. They wanted to enjoy the freedom of going on a date without their parents' watchful eyes. As courting made way for dating, the rules changed. Men invited women on dates, and they often paid, taking the control away from the women and giving it to the men.
Dating Rules
Parents should be able to trust their teenagers before the dating process begins. Even then, boundaries should be set, advises the Family Guide a website at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Parents should meet the other person before the date begins. Find out the details, such as where the teenagers are going, who else will be there, if adults will be present, who is driving and when they'll be home. Establish a no-alcohol or drug policy.
Healthy Teen Relationships
A healthy teen relationship should be fun and make your teen feel good about herself. Communication should be open, with both teens being able to comfortably talk about their feelings. Listening is critical because it shows respect and how much the relationship is valued. Trust and respect are also critical elements in a healthy teen relationship. Even when the boy and girl disagree, they should be able to calmly discuss their feelings without fear.
Unhealthy Teen Relationships
In an unhealthy teen relationship, one of them often feels a lack of respect and trust. Violence of any sort is a sign of an extremely unhealthy relationship. According to the Alabama Coalition Against Domestic Violence, one in three teens has been involved in some type of violence while dating. It happens when one of the teens forces control over the other person, and it crosses all social, economic and racial lines. Generally, the victim is the girl. Before dating begins, teens need to know that they have choices and respect themselves enough to realize that violence isn't part of any healthy relationship.
Dating Ideas for Teens
Before going on a date, teenagers should make plans for what they want to do. Some ideas for teen dating include going to a movie, going out to eat, attending a sporting event, playing putt-putt golf, going bowling and attending parties. On a nice evening, walking on a beach or sitting in the backyard gazing at the stars can be just as enjoyable as a more costly date. The most important aspect of a date is to have an activity that both people enjoy.
Member Comments